Pray

Pray... thats what a friend had told me once. he said it has very strong powers- something deep and transcending which makes impossible seem possible. i have been praying for a while now. to overcome everything that i lack, for the strength to carry on, to help deal with worry, for my loved ones, to be able to be sane in this insane world. I pray for the hundreds who have lost their lives in the recent bombay blasts, for their families to have courage, for the evil minds to have sense and sensibility who planned these attacks in the first place, for the people- to learn to live in the city from which i am so far away. its never going to be the same again. i somehow remember these words right now... be compassionate, u dont know what battle the other person is waging.

Last few days have been weird. i have been overwhelmed with incessant worry about relationships, career and life at large. but inspite of everything i am thankful for a lot of things. thankful for a mind that has been balanced, for family, for the sun, for the ability to believe in myself....for being alive!

%^$%$#$#@#@#!

I cant fight it anymore
I can see it coming
There is nothing that can be done to change your mind
Mind games don't matter anymore
I want to break free, i need to get out and get a new attitude
I finally see that i have made my peace with it
Yet there is a hope somwhere that goodness pays, that there will still be tomorrow!

U & I

Eternal shall be the time when we meet and timeless the journey be

For then the skies above and the stars will twinkle down upon us

The fresh dew on the lily and the magic in the air will be ours

Solitude and serendipity whispers in the wind.......

To cherish every moment that is bestowed upon by the will of kind fate

As we walk along leaving footprints in the sands of time.

............................................................

"Mohobatton mein jeene wale khush naseeb hai, mohobatton mein marne wale bhi kya ajeeb hai...
azeem hai humari dastaan jaaneman, phaslo pe chalte hai lekin phir bhi kareeb hai! "

Love makes the world go round.....Alas wish it was that simple.
we try and make things happen yet there are times its all worthless, suddenly the perceptions change. we all have our guards on all the time and are so scared to let them down lest the real you shall be exposed. this defence mechanism works best to avoid hurt.
but thats not what its supposed to be like, the whole thing has feel real and true.

Falling

I am Falling....
rapidly....
something is dragging me away
In the deep recesses of darkness
sinking....
Is is quick sand?
Pulling, tugging, holding me down
gasping....
For air and the warm sun
I demand Emancipation...

Distance

Oh how it feels to be stuck in a loveless situation
Peace of mind denied and inability to hope
U take away those two things which were only mine
Strive for emotional balance and the need to belong
Just another person in the walk of life you may think

But if only you knew what u'd been missing out on
How I could change your life if u desire so....

out of control

when craziness go crazy....
when the world spins around...
Life is getting out of control!

Tired of the anxiety and the gloom,
Tired of the confusion and mess,
Should gather the broken pieces,
Its all in the mind.

But i know that when time comes I'd do the right thing,
I'd make a choice,
And just hope that all will be alright one day!

The One

i await someone....
who has a tinge in his eye and a tinkle in his smile
with thoughts that leave you dazed and vigor abundant
who conquers the world with his words
a quiet strength, intense and passion galore
a mighty heart, a generous spirit

i conjure up an image of that perfection
train my eyes to single him out, to find him amongst the millions
destiny strikes and i know he must be around, awaiting the call
A man who knows how to be the one!

Bharatnatyam

I was fortunate enough to have attended an 'Arangetram' few days back. It was magical and simply captivating. The Carnatic renditions, Mridangam, Natraja, beautiful costumes, the central performer...oh it was so much of a feeling of being at home. I guess this dance form is something that I have felt very deeply about and regret the fact that I should have pursued it more sincerely over the years. I wont deny that watching and performing the same gives me an immense sense of joy and satisfaction. the fact is that it is so graceful and different in its approach which makes bharatnatyam stand out amongst other contemporary classical dances of India. It means bha- bhaav, ra- raga, ta- taal and natyam- dance. originally practiced by the Devdasis in the the Temples, today it has a more popular approach in the form of dance schools and international cultural troops.
Things i had learnt as a child cannot be forgotten. the hours of foot work, getting the neck movement correct, sitting in 'Aramandi', developing the hand 'Mudras', rolling the eyes and understanding the taal is something that will stay with me forever. though its a bit rusty right now I do hope to get back to it soon.
It requires hours of dedication, stamina, grace and focus to master a simple movement. Getting the posture, the expressions, the rhythm in sync is a tedious task. That night I felt that it must be such a big high to have THAT solo performance after years of devotion.

We- The Living

we play the game....we pretend
we laugh and we act stupid, we do things to please others
time and again we fool them
into believing us and our false personalities
we have our reasons and we dont care
there is a moment of respite...we gather our wits
plot and strategise and think of options
we do the dance, we do the jig....
we market ourselves shamelessly
we procrastinate, we do things we dont want to

why?